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[title] => ‘Tjedna doza‘ Silvane Uzinić: Cin-cin, čin-čin, na-gu-zi-se... Otvaraju nas i zatvaraju kako im ćefne. Pa di oni žive?!
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Kao i dosad, kada je riječ o pandemiji slijedit ćemo preporuke struke. Ako nas ona odvede do stražnjice, razmislit ćemo i o toj opciji - rekao je Stefan De Keermaecker, glasnogovornik Europske unije zadužen za zdravstvo, o mogućnosti uvođenja analnih testova na koronavirus, kakve je navodno počela primjenjivati Kina. Ma bravo, Stefan, u sridu! A di smo već odavno, pitam se.
Vijest iz Kine o uzimanju briseva iz analnog otvora stigla je ponegdje s popratnom fotografijom pa smo fino mogli zamisliti kako nam još samo fali da se naguzimo svaki put kad odemo na testiranje da ono što u stvarnosti imamo bude tim zornije. Cin - cin, čin - čin, na – gu – zi – se, mo – lin!
Di Božinović živi?
Otvaraju nas i zatvaraju kako im ćefne. Božinović nam objasni zašto kafići ostaju zatvoreni pa kaže da bi "dozvola za prodaju kave za van bila praktički otvaranje kafića". "Neke objekte smo ostavili otvorenima, poput benzinskih, pekarnica, kioska... no ne zbog kave za van".
Pa di taj lik živi? Ko mu kupuje kruh? Sigurno mu osobni vozač ide po gorivo jer da je vidio redove mladih na benzinskim shvatio bi koliko nema pojma što se događa. Lokali, koji inače služe i hranu, ništa drugo i ne rade osim šta kroz prozorčić dodaju kave leva-leva. Ljudi se razmile s tim kavama okolo ko gaštrapani, traže zidiće i klupe. "Ti sidi na jedan kraj, a ja ću na drugi."
Naša struka se natrtila političarima još pred izbore, sjetimo se bar onog ključnog tjedna kad su se zatvarale granice prema BiH pa hitno otvarale. Svaki dan u medijima je neka struka, epidemiolozi, virusolozi, infektolozi, mikrobiolozi, pulmolozi, jednom ekonomisti, drugi put ugostitelji, pa psihijatri koji viču da ćemo svi prolupat. Normalno, već jesmo. Susrećem i nazivam ljude koji moraju provježbat glasnice prije nego šta progovore od višesatne šutnje iz akutne usamljenosti i tjeskobe. Neki nenormalno dugo pričaju za nenadanih susreta na ulici, govore čudnovate stvari, a sve iz puke potrebe da uopće govore. Prijatelji me pozivaju u šetnje s tim odurnim kavama u kartonima za lijepa vremena, a svaka kiša donosi depresiju. U kojoj sjedimo pred ekranima i gledamo u te stručnjake, a u tupom raspoloženju nam se čini da oni samo neprekidno bale i bale budzašto.
- Ma nemaju pojma, al' ne kužiš – govori mi nekidan prijatelj.
- A evo, još uvik se napinjem da pohvatam konce.
Svi odavno pozitivni
U početku pandemije sretni smo pisali da su u javnom prostoru napokon stručnjaci zamijenili bižuterijske celebritije i influencere. Pomno smo ih slušali i gledali preko videa u njihovim uredima diljem svijeta, napinjali se da ih skužimo i manito pratili njihove Fejsbuk postove. A kad smo već naučili napamet scenografiju koja ih okružuje dok nam sole pamet, raspored slika na njihovim zidovima i knjige na policama, počeli smo pomalo shvaćati da ne samo da govore upravo suprotno jedan od drugoga, nego suprotno u odnosu na same sebe. Danas ovako, već za tri dana onako. Te popustimo, te zategnimo, te dobri smo, te alarmantno smo loši. Nekidan jedan od njih govori da smo u opasnijoj situaciji nego na početku prosinca. Dolazi novi soj, ne popuštajmo. Brojke padaju, to je dobro ili ne, to nije dobro, samo nam se čini jer.... ne testiramo dovoljno, ali oni testiraju pa im raste, oni imaju policijski sat i ne uspijevaju, oni tamo nemaju ništa pa im pada...
A evo nam sad i geopolitičari. Kažu da će se oni koji kupe kinesko cjepivo protiv COVID-a Kinezima praktično na – gu – zit, jer kao, "čin-čin" ništa ne daje besplatno.
Isto je i s Rusima, ako ti zabiju taj svoj sputnik to ti je ko da su ti Putinov torpedo poslali. Ameri, poslovično, idu na goli profit, vidite da se cjenkaju, nekom su prodali za ovoliko, drugome za onoliko. A ko uzme cjepivo s Kube, taj k'o da je tetoviro Che Guevaru na rame. Cin – cin, struci se ve – se – lin. Čin - čin, na - gu - zi se, mo - lin!
Uglavnom, da nam dublje začeprkaju po analnom otvoru ispostavilo bi se da smo svi manje-više već odavno pozitivni!
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Kao i dosad, kada je riječ o pandemiji slijedit ćemo preporuke struke. Ako nas ona odvede do stražnjice, razmislit ćemo i o toj opciji - rekao je Stefan De Keermaecker, glasnogovornik Europske unije zadužen za zdravstvo, o mogućnosti uvođenja analnih testova na koronavirus, kakve je navodno počela primjenjivati Kina. Ma bravo, Stefan, u sridu! A di smo već odavno, pitam se.
Vijest iz Kine o uzimanju briseva iz analnog otvora stigla je ponegdje s popratnom fotografijom pa smo fino mogli zamisliti kako nam još samo fali da se naguzimo svaki put kad odemo na testiranje da ono što u stvarnosti imamo bude tim zornije. Cin - cin, čin - čin, na – gu – zi – se, mo – lin!
Di Božinović živi?
Otvaraju nas i zatvaraju kako im ćefne. Božinović nam objasni zašto kafići ostaju zatvoreni pa kaže da bi "dozvola za prodaju kave za van bila praktički otvaranje kafića". "Neke objekte smo ostavili otvorenima, poput benzinskih, pekarnica, kioska... no ne zbog kave za van".
Pa di taj lik živi? Ko mu kupuje kruh? Sigurno mu osobni vozač ide po gorivo jer da je vidio redove mladih na benzinskim shvatio bi koliko nema pojma što se događa. Lokali, koji inače služe i hranu, ništa drugo i ne rade osim šta kroz prozorčić dodaju kave leva-leva. Ljudi se razmile s tim kavama okolo ko gaštrapani, traže zidiće i klupe. "Ti sidi na jedan kraj, a ja ću na drugi."
Naša struka se natrtila političarima još pred izbore, sjetimo se bar onog ključnog tjedna kad su se zatvarale granice prema BiH pa hitno otvarale. Svaki dan u medijima je neka struka, epidemiolozi, virusolozi, infektolozi, mikrobiolozi, pulmolozi, jednom ekonomisti, drugi put ugostitelji, pa psihijatri koji viču da ćemo svi prolupat. Normalno, već jesmo. Susrećem i nazivam ljude koji moraju provježbat glasnice prije nego šta progovore od višesatne šutnje iz akutne usamljenosti i tjeskobe. Neki nenormalno dugo pričaju za nenadanih susreta na ulici, govore čudnovate stvari, a sve iz puke potrebe da uopće govore. Prijatelji me pozivaju u šetnje s tim odurnim kavama u kartonima za lijepa vremena, a svaka kiša donosi depresiju. U kojoj sjedimo pred ekranima i gledamo u te stručnjake, a u tupom raspoloženju nam se čini da oni samo neprekidno bale i bale budzašto.
- Ma nemaju pojma, al' ne kužiš – govori mi nekidan prijatelj.
- A evo, još uvik se napinjem da pohvatam konce.
Svi odavno pozitivni
U početku pandemije sretni smo pisali da su u javnom prostoru napokon stručnjaci zamijenili bižuterijske celebritije i influencere. Pomno smo ih slušali i gledali preko videa u njihovim uredima diljem svijeta, napinjali se da ih skužimo i manito pratili njihove Fejsbuk postove. A kad smo već naučili napamet scenografiju koja ih okružuje dok nam sole pamet, raspored slika na njihovim zidovima i knjige na policama, počeli smo pomalo shvaćati da ne samo da govore upravo suprotno jedan od drugoga, nego suprotno u odnosu na same sebe. Danas ovako, već za tri dana onako. Te popustimo, te zategnimo, te dobri smo, te alarmantno smo loši. Nekidan jedan od njih govori da smo u opasnijoj situaciji nego na početku prosinca. Dolazi novi soj, ne popuštajmo. Brojke padaju, to je dobro ili ne, to nije dobro, samo nam se čini jer.... ne testiramo dovoljno, ali oni testiraju pa im raste, oni imaju policijski sat i ne uspijevaju, oni tamo nemaju ništa pa im pada...
A evo nam sad i geopolitičari. Kažu da će se oni koji kupe kinesko cjepivo protiv COVID-a Kinezima praktično na – gu – zit, jer kao, "čin-čin" ništa ne daje besplatno.
Isto je i s Rusima, ako ti zabiju taj svoj sputnik to ti je ko da su ti Putinov torpedo poslali. Ameri, poslovično, idu na goli profit, vidite da se cjenkaju, nekom su prodali za ovoliko, drugome za onoliko. A ko uzme cjepivo s Kube, taj k'o da je tetoviro Che Guevaru na rame. Cin – cin, struci se ve – se – lin. Čin - čin, na - gu - zi se, mo - lin!
Uglavnom, da nam dublje začeprkaju po analnom otvoru ispostavilo bi se da smo svi manje-više već odavno pozitivni!
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15. svibanj 2024 07:47
